Wednesday, July 28, 2010

In a Moment

The Lord spoke to me.  This is what He said:

See, I have this day set you
Over the nations and over the
To root out and to pull down
To destroy and to throw down,
To build and to plant.
-Jeremiah 1:10

A while ago I posted about being deceived. God, in a few moments, had revealed and removed a dark cloud over me that was heavy with lies and deceit. What freedom!  But for what purpose was I freed?  For what assignment has He been preparing me?  In another moment, God revealed and restored the call that I first heard when I was in high school.  My very good friend, DMcGee had invited me to her church.  It was a very small gathering of white folks who love Jesus.  And here, these two little black girls wanted to be a part.  I don't remember the sermon, but at the end we held hands in a circle to pray.  In a moment, I was surrounded, hands laid upon me, and a voice of a gray-haired lady said, "You will be a trumpet for God."

DMcGee and I have talked about that day only a few times.  Few people even know it occurred. But God did not forget what He spoke.  God did not forsake the workmanship of His hands, even if I, like a lost bird, got off course. The pain I felt for all those years, was nothing but a homing signal to put me back on course, to return me to the heart of God.

In a moment, God showed me that the fiery part of me, even though it is bright and all-consuming, is only a small part of me.  I am more like the very earth from which I was formed. I've tried to be something else for a long time, but now I'm embracing myself the way God made me.

No wonder I love so many things that come from the earth.  No wonder I have a heart for foreign lands. From the rustic to the glamorous, from herbs and dark wood to truffles and jewels.  I love the things of the earth.  The name I chose for my first child has earth in it for crying out loud! God uses words in this scripture that move my innards and inspire joy rather than tears. Jeremiah had a rough time of things. It cannot easy being a prophet of destruction, but if you look beyond the wrath and desolation, you'll see that God only wants His people to return to Him, to tune in to his signal and get back on course, to stay rooted and grounded in Him and allow Him to nourish them with His overwhelming love.

 I gladly yield to the potter's hand as He shapes His clay.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

This is CRAZY, but I simply had to post it.  "Dhani's List".  There is a little bit of vulgarity, but it's worth it.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Epiphany 1- Not Quite Fabulous

1.a Christian festival, observed onJanuary 6, commemorating the manifestation of Christ to thegentiles in the persons of the Magi; Twelfth-day
2. an appearance or manifestation, esp. of a deity.
3. a sudden, intuitive perception of or insight into the reality or essential meaning of something, usually initiated by somesimple, homely, or commonplace occurrence or experience.
4. a literary work or section of a work presenting, usually symbolically, such a moment of revelation and insight.

I recently experienced an epiphany of the third kind.  I had a sudden insight into a deeper meaning of something when my very homely, commonplace, un-fabulous radio broke. I bought it for my work area to make my clients feel more comfortable.  Because it wasn't a necessity, I thought that 20 bucks was the max I would spend.  Two months later the antenna broke. Three or four months later the CD player stopped playing.  Now, I can't even get talk radio station to come in clear!  So, I have to buy a whole new radio.  Not fabulous.

My epiphany was this: I have a responsibility to fully embody my role as a ruler in God's kingdom, as a co-heir with Christ, especially when it comes to how I handle money. I have a responsibility to be fabulous.

During the downest of down economies this generation has seen,  God has prospered me financially.  When many people are unemployed, I have a job that pays well, that I enjoy and is close to home.  When many people are being laid off, downsized or otherwise disposed of, I got a 4% raise.  When many people are fearing how they will pay their bills, I am starting a business and expecting great profit.

Why, then, am I afraid to spend money on myself?  Now I don't mean for frivolous pursuits.  But when I need something, why do I always get what is cheaper and of less quality and will end up wearing out and needing to be replaced?  Why do I put off things that need to be done with my money that will enhance my life and ministry and choose to put my money toward things that only slow me down and sap my energy? 

I do believe that my family was generationally cursed in the area of finances, on both sides, my parents come from people who lived through the Great Depression and came out depressed and oppressed.  Being set free from that curse, I now must live victoriously with my finances.  That means the underlying fear that there won't be enough and that no more is coming must be cast out by the knowledge that God's love for me won't let me be without what I need and that His unique call on my life is for wealth and abundance.

I have a right and responsibility to be fabulous.  My brand of fabulousness may be different from everyone else's, but like anyone else's, it is undeniable.  So today, I commit to stop denying my right to be fabulous!

My spirit declares freedom from lack and debt.  My spirit declares abundance and wealth for His glory.  My spirit declares my future generations to walk in even greater freedom and abundance, believing God for His riches in heaven to be made manifest for them on earth.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

How does one make a list of the events that changed one's life?  I'm sure I could, but then this wouldn't be a blog as much as a diary.  I'm not even sure how to articulate all the new thoughts, attitudes and perspectives that have developed in my experience.  I can say that the love of God has washed me anew.  The gospel of the kingdom is more real to me now than ever before.  Faith is now a substance and an evidence in my life.  All of this because, the Holy Spirit has baptized me into victorious thinking, speaking and living.


I used to mean/ didn't care 'bout a thing/ living for me and all of my needs
I was self-serving yet desperate and hurting/in need to be
Not the same
No, No, No
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
Jesus has changed me
Not the same

Oooo, it's all for you/all that I am/all that I do
I've given into life-giving truth/I've come to believe/ I can be new
You took all my sin/gave peace within/took all my doubt
Assured me of Him, now

He's now why I live
My life is His!

Not the same
No, No, No
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
Jesus has changed me 
Not the same

-Not the Same, recorded my Crystal Lewis