Monday, July 9, 2012

A wise woman said, "Sometimes you are able to give more because of what you don't have."  Mr. Miyagi said it another way, "Best way to avoid punch, no be there," the mantra of the famous Drum Technique.
Since my last post I've been pondering, on one level or another, my life vision and the major paradigm shift that I've experienced in recent months.  In a quiet time of prayer I saw my Before dreams and my After dreams side by side - what a polar distinction!  On one hand is the glamourous NYC power picture.  Amazing apartment, artsy friends, entrepreneurial prowess, pavement pounding in Tod's heels and gypsy-chic jewels.  On the other hand is the simple adventure. A huge estate on acres of land...and a river runs through it.  Artsy friends, homeschooling and dyeing wool shorn from my very own sheep.  Two separate lives on two separate planes.  How can I possibly have both?  What man out there could possibly carry on this double life with me? As much as I hate the grey areas that lead to the maturity of strengthened faith, I desperately desire to be able to live in the worm hole between two universes. 

But a wormhole is destined to collapse on itself. The pendulum that remains dead center stops the clock.  Ayurveda teaches that the body is never in perfect health. We are always balancing between the elements.  So, the question is (bare with me as I wax philosophical), is balance the absence of inequality or is balance the equal distribution of time, weight, thought, etc.?

Depending on the circumstance, it could be both. Let's use fire and water as an example. If you have too much fire, you need water. But if you put the fire out, then water over abounds. So we must have equal amounts of fire and water to be in balance. Correct? Unless, it is necessary to have more fire than water. In the movie, The Grey, I don't think Liam Neeson and his buddies would have been able to stay warm if they dug a pond, nor would they have been able to fend of the monstrous wolves with buckets of water. No, they needed fire, contained and controlled fire, but fire and fire in abundance. An element out of balance, kept the stranded men alive and spurred them to keep going.

Could it be the same in life?  Balancing an equation is the same as cancelling out the equation.  I don't want my life to be nothing with no forward movement.  If I can do all things through Christ, somewhere in the "all" something is going to be equal and opposite to something else, which inevitably renders both things void.  But if I can do all things through Christ at different times, in different seasons, with varying degrees of intensity, then something or many things will be out of balance before the pendulum swings back the other way.  The thought is freeing and maddening at the same time.  So, let's not think about it. 

I jest.  But seriously, perhaps the best way to live life not focused on the click of the clock as the pendulum swings, but to live knowing that the next swing is a new opportunity to give, to share, to sacrifice and to gain.  For whatever is missing on one side shall surely be found on the other.

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