Thursday, February 17, 2011

This is it

It happened two nights ago.  After years of battling confusion, countless prayers mottled with tears, midnights marked by fear and lack of trust, I finally jumped off the hampster wheel and scrambled my way out of the cage.  I am fearless and free!

Crazy how change occurs in an instant.  In the instant a baby is born, the mother forgets the pain and discomfort she endured to get to that moment.  In the instant a boxer knocks out his opponent he no longer remembers the pain in his jaw or that he can't see out of his right eye.  There is always the build up, the pummeling, the pushing, the raw straining of sanity and strength.  Then comes the plateau, the point of exhaustion and disorientation when giving up seems like the only option. 

But, if you don't give up, if you remember why you got into the ring in the first place, if you concentrate on the life that is about to birth forth, then you realize there is no other option, but to "Get up! Stand up! Don't give up the fight" as Bob Marley encourages (FYI, I don't agree with any of the rest of the song).  "Now blows brave the elusive second wind" (Ha! That one's mine) and suddenly, like the strike of a bell, your victory rings out. Fear is defeated. It's a new day.  I'm not afraid anymore.  THIS IS IT!!!!

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